THE WHITE HOUSE
OFFICE OF STRATEGIC WINNING & AERIAL DOMINANCE
OFFICIAL STATEMENT ON THE NEW "INSTINCT-ONLY" F-35 PROGRAM
Because Real American Pilots Don't Need Training Wheels
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE — As exclusively revealed by Real Eagles Network (REN), President Donald J. Trump has transformed a so-called "radar delay" into the boldest pilot empowerment program since the invention of aviation itself.
Weak-kneed critics cry "scandal," but this White House knows better: we're forging warriors who fly not by gadgets, but by God-given American instinct.
"Anybody can fly with radar," the President declared. "But it takes a real American to sense the enemy, lock on with pure confidence, and deliver freedom from 50,000 feet."