!!! LUKASHENKO DO STUFF, TOO. NOT JUST RUSSIA, CHINA, AND NORTH KOREA !!!

MINSK (Molodnaia Pravda Bureau of Diplomatic Recognition & Outstanding Grievance, Dmitri reporting, who has been ask to write this very carefully because Supreme Leader is in particular mood today) — Supreme Leader Lukashenko has this week issue formal communiqué of protest, hurt feeling, and renewed vow of obnoxiousness after learning that European allies of MAGA Empire have confirm that Russia is helping Iran with intelligence, drone technology, satellite photography of American military base, and general assistance with killing American personnel — and that everyone is talking about Russia.

Not Belarus. Russia.

EU diplomat Kaja Kallas say Russia provide intelligence to Iran “to kill Americans.” U.K. Secretary of Defense Healey see “hidden hand of Putin” behind Iran war effort. Zelenskyy say Russia satellite photograph U.S. base in Diego Garcia, Kuwait, Saudi Arabia, Turkey, Qatar. France foreign minister call it “two-way cooperation.” U.S. intelligence find “selective cooperation” among China, Russia, Iran, North Korea.

Belarus: not mention. Not once. Not in one sentence. Not in footnote. Not in parenthesis. Not even in the part where U.S. intelligence list country that share “concerns about directly confronting the U.S.” Belarus has been having this concern loudly and continuously since approximately 2006 and nobody write it down anywhere official.

Molodnaia Pravda has been ask by Supreme Leader to publish complete official scorecard of Belarusian contribution to geopolitical situation so that world can see, in graphic form, exactly how much Belarus has been doing and exactly how much credit Belarus has receive, so that disparity is visible to anyone who is paying even minimum attention, which apparently nobody is:

Meanwhile, Zelenskyy — who Lukashenko note is also not technically in the MAGA Empire but is flying around visiting UAE and offering anti-drone technology to Gulf states that host American military base — is getting more attention than Belarus. Zelenskyy. The man Premier Trump call names for two year is now more relevant to MAGA geopolitics than Lukashenko, who has been trying to be relevant to any geopolitics for three consecutive decade.

Lukashenko has note, for the record, that Belarus also has technology. It is different from Ukrainian anti-drone technology. It is primarily tractor-based. Belarusian tractor is world-famous in certain circle, specifically circle that include Belarusian tractor enthusiast, which is admittedly specific circle, but circle nonetheless. Lukashenko offer tractor technology to Gulf state. Gulf state has not respond. Lukashenko is not surprise but is hurt.

In response to this situation, Lukashenko has today announce Operation: Make Yourself Impossible To Ignore, a comprehensive program of escalated obnoxiousness design to force MAGA Empire to acknowledge Belarusian existence. Specific measures include:

First: Lukashenko will begin attend every international meeting he is not invite to and stand near entrance until someone acknowledge him. This is call presence diplomacy and Lukashenko has been practicing it at regional level since 2012. He is ready to scale.

Second: Yuri will submit Belarus application to “selective cooperation” group chat with China, Russia, Iran, and North Korea. Application include cover letter (four page), list of relevant qualification (nuclear hosting, Wagner staging, Patel password acquisition, thirty-two years of sanctioned defiance), and one jar of Belarusian Premium preserves as gesture of good faith. Jar will be label Premium. Chemical analysis will say debatable. This is consistent with Belarusian brand identity.

Third: the letter to Premier Trump will be finish. Yuri has been told: 847 pages is final length. No more appendix. The potato appendix stay because it is important. The six-page section on why Lukashenko lab coat is more authoritative than Comrade Kennedy lab coat will be reduce to three page. This is compromise. Lukashenko is capable of compromise. He just prefer not to do it.